Oh One Day To Be Married....

Well....I am back from a tiny vacation and some time off from blogging. I know you all missed me so much....and I missed you all as well. The last few weeks have been insanely busy and I don't think things look like they are going to slow down any time soon. I was up at Chesley Lake for a few days a couple of weeks ago and am hoping to get up for another few days come this long weekend....if my work schedule permits it. Then I come home and it's off to Pensylvania for a weekend College and University conference for young adults interested in ministry and missions....me being the latter.....however I once heard a statement that I have adopted...."the mission field is the space between your two feet". Anyways on Saturday my family and I headed to Stratford for my cousin's wedding. We all traveled in one vehicle....something we have not done in a while...usually I drive so the 3 of us kids are not squished in the back. It was a bit of an adventure but a lot of fun as well. The wedding was beautiful, Steph is the first of the cousin's to be married....she married Greg.....I think they make a beautiful couple. I know they will be very happy together. Weddings make me so happy....it is a day that usually feels like a dream come true. At least I imagine it to be that way. Sometimes I worry that I will never find the right guy.....or that he will find me....since I am quite shy when it comes to those things, although many don't know it. I know I have to trust the Lord with my heart and that he will bring him along in his timing.....I still manage to worry a great deal over the whole thing. I suppose it is a lot of girls dream to meet the man of her dreams, get married and have a family. Those are all dreams of mine but I think somewhat more down to earth as I get older and observe what seems to work and doesn't work in a relationship. I am glad up unto this point that I have never been in a relationship. There are too many girls who think that there whole life will be fixed when she falls in love. That her man will make everything perfect and make her feel wonderful all the time. I think that this way of thinking is too much for any human being and only sets people up for relationships that fail and lack depth. I dream of being in a relationship where I can't wait to see the person just because I want to talk to him and hear what he thinks about things. I love to hear about couples who just love being together and have fun learning more about the other. I work with a girl who I think has a great marriage. She has such a deep respect for her husband, I see it in the way she talks about him. She loves to hang out with him. She gives me lots of great advice. She often tells me how much you have to work at your marriage to make it great......she really seems to live out what she says. I love to listen to the stories she tells me of all of the fun her and her husband have. It makes me look forward to one day doing life day by day with your best friend. Learning to love them completely.....to be able to see all of who they are and love them unconditionally. It's like practising loving someone everyday the way that God loves us. Whoever he is....I just keep praying for him, praying that God will weave the stories of our lives together and it will be beautiful. I pray that he would come to know and love Jesus more and more everyday. Hmmm......see.....this is what weddings do to me! Anyways so there is my rant for the evening.....I better head to bed, tomorrow I need to head to the office again.....lots to be done for the new Sunday School program we are starting in the fall called 252 Basics.....lots of recruiting to be done. If any of you out there feel the desire to serve and be blessed through this program and the kids....I would absoloutely LOVE to hear from you!

Many Blessings,
The Kindred Spirit

Wednesday night thoughts...

Today was a bit cooler. It was nice. I love the warm weather but it is nice to have a day where it isn't sweltering. I worked at the mall today, it was a good day. Tonight we had our second sunday school meeting to get ready for the new program starting in september. I am really excited about the program. We just keep praying that God will place a passion for serving on people's hearts. I trust that He will give us the people that we need. Yesterday was very hot. While I was working at the mall I was making small talk to a woman while she was checking out at the cash register. I was comenting on how hot the day was, the women's reply made me think for the rest of the afternoon. She said "yah, it's like hell out there". Hmmm....it's like hell out there. I wanted to say I don't think you know what hell is like. It reminds me of that saying that earth is the only hell some will know and the only heaven others will know. I guess for that woman's sake and for anyone's sake I guess I should hope it is like hell out there and that she won't ever have to experience what hell is like. Some of the people that come into the store say very interesting things. Tomorrow morning Josh and I are up and at it again....we are babysitting Ron and Renee's 3 beautiful girls. They have so much energy and passion....I love it!!!! I will need to remind myself of this when my alarm goes off in the morning. I guess that's all for tonight.

Sleep well my friends,
The Kindred Spirit

A Blah of a day...

Today is a blah day. You know those days where the sun is shining but you just don't feel like its sunny. You feel like the clouds should be out or it should be raining. Today I feel sad. In yesterday's blog I said that I thought that I would sleep great last night....I was wrong to say the least. I had a horrible sleep last night and there wasn't much sleeping. For some reason I couldn't sleep because I was afraid and my heart was racing. That kind of thing doesn't happen to me very often. Usually before I go to sleep I think about all of the events of the day and of the next day and go over every detail that I can remember. Things bother me at night because I analyze it all in my mind. Last night I kept having memories of scary things and I just couldn't find a thought of peace to lull me to sleep. This morning Josh and I were up early to babysit. This afternoon I am working at the office. So perhaps today is a blah day because I feel tired. Nothing ever seems right when I am too tired. Things bug me, my temper is quicker and I just can't be content. I am on call to work at the mall tonight but I kind of hope I don't have to go in but I really should want to because I need the money! Usually I get called in when I don't want to be and I don't get called in when I want to be....funny how that works. I guess I will find out later. Today is also hot....actually I think hot doesn't even describe the weather.....extremely hot and humid would be a better description. We have a new air conditioner upstairs in our house....I am so thankful for that. Anyways I hope your day is less blah than mine!

Blessings,
Darc

The sweet smell of clean clothes....

I was inspired when I visited my mom's blog today and I too felt the need for a change. So I changed my blog too.....I like to change stuff like that....I will use this one until it becomes boring to me! Anyways today was a good day. I expected it to be sunny but it was rather cloudy. I taught kids church this morning and then went out for lunch to Swiss Chalet...the ultimate after church restaurant....and that was followed by a lovely excursion to Starbucks. By the way I think I am becoming addicted to Starbucks. I just can't get enough of those green tea frap's. I also watched Pride and Prejudice again....love it....could watch it a million times! I love Sunday nights....mom is making pizza and I think Dad is creating a blog. Aren't we just becoming quite the blogging family! My youngest brother Josh got Facebook yesterday and he is already hooked.....it is so funny. The only 2 that aren't on facebook are my Dad and Greg....but I think it is only a matter of time.

Yesterday my Mom and I spent the day down in the Markham-Stouffville area with my Nana. It was a great day. I love talking to my mom about everything. She is a great listener. We got pictures taken in one of those mall photo-booths....they are great...I will post them later. The Markville mall is huge. It was quite a shock to see that many people shopping...it is a long way from my small town. On the way home we sang our hearts out to some good ol'e country....gotta luv Martina....have you ever heard a woman sing like she can? When we got home at around 10 the new front load washer had arrived. For those of you who didn't know, the washer has been down in my house for about 2 weeks now. I thought that the new washer would arrive sooner than it did so I decided that I could wait to do laundry and didn't need to go to the laundrymat.....stupid.....I did 3 loads of laundry last night out of nothing but pure desperation to be reminded of what clean clothes smell like. So I was up quite late, or should I say early washing clothes. I felt it this morning. I didn't take a Sunday nap today either. I think I will sleep well tonight. Perhaps I can get in another load of laundry before I go to bed.....the front load washers have a window in the front, you can watch your clothes being cleaned. Of course I would never do that because I have better things to do with my time........most of the time! I would also really love to finish the book I have been reading tonight.....SexGod....the name may be a little sketchy to some of you but I tell you....read it and it will change your life! On the note of Rob Bell, I watched his newest Nooma video yesterday called "store". It is about anger. It was great, it made me think. Rob Bell usually makes me think though. I have really been trying to control my mouth lately. One of the family traits that runs in the line of women in my family is a quick tongue. We Timbers women are good with our mouths. I don't want to use that trait to hurt people. It is really good for me to practice building people up with my words and not putting them down. Although I have to take it one step at a time. I feel things deeply and in turn react to them deeply....sometimes that is a wonderful thing and sometimes it works against me. So that is one of the areas I am trying to grow in. Anyways if you have a chance to see "Store" I definitely recommend it!

I better head downstairs and see how Dad's blog is coming along. Hope this evening finds you well,
The Kindred Spirit

Picture of the Week...

One of my friends from work went camping and took this shot. I love it. It is absoloutely breathtaking. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!


Yours Truly,
Darc

Love

I have been reading a lot lately. Guess my reading has to do a lot with my desire to know God more and understand him. One of my favourites that I have not been able to put down is Sex God by Rob Bell. He is an amazing communicator. This excerpt made me think a lot about the way I love people and about love....this is what Rob writes.......
"Love is handing your heart to someone and taking the risk that they will hand it back because they don't want it. That's why it's such a crushing ache on the inside. We gave away a part of ourselves and it wasn't wanted.
Love is a giving away of power. When we love, we give the other person the power in the relationship. They can do what they choose. They can so what they like with our love. They can reject it, they can accept it, they can step toward us in gratitude and appreciation.
Love is a giving away. When we love, we put ourselves out there, we expose ourselves to be vulnerable. Love is giving up control. It's surrendering the desire to control the other person. The two - love and controlling power over the other person - are mutually exclusive. If we are serious about loving someone, we have to surrender all of the desires within us to manipulate the relationship."

Too often I try to have control in my relationships. Come to think of it, I think a lot of us are guilty of that. There is something about having control that gives us this sense of power. Love is giving up control. Hmmm....that's a powerful statement, a statement which I think has the power to transform our relationships. I guess we see the ultimate example in Jesus. Jesus loved and never demanded control.

I think I have a lot to learn about love!

Learning to love more,
The Kindred Spirit

Picture of the Week...

I am going to start a new weekly posting entitled picture of the week. Here is my first picture of the week...

This picture makes me smile. I hope it will make you smile too!

Yours Truly,
The Kindred Spirit

Faith like a Child...

Tonight we had a campfire with some friends from church. A little celebration of the end of school I guess you could say. I had to work until 9 but I joined them afterwards. It was so good to be together. I love being together with other believers who are friends. I love it when there are so many kids around, it brings such life. I sat with 2 of the younger girls for a while and just listened to them talk about what is going on in their worlds.

Do you ever just sit and listen to a child talk? It is really fascinating. To see the world how they see it. To love like they love. To hug like they hug. To laugh like they laugh. To cry when they hurt. That is part of the reason I love working with children. You always know how they feel. They ask the simple questions. They trust. You can be stern when you need to and they will still love you. We can learn so much from kids. It makes me think about having a childlike faith. Coming to Jesus as a child. I know I make it too complex. I have this desire to understand everything when I know I can't. I need to have faith more like a child. I need to laugh more and hug more and trust more. Trust. I have issues with trust. I want to know everything, that makes it hard to just trust. Today my prayer is that I could just trust. That prayer could take a while! I wonder how trust happens? I trust a chair when I sit on it, that it will hold me up. I trust the car everytime I drive it. I trust my parents.....most of the time...lol! Why do I have trouble trusting God?

Today I listened to a sermon by a guy named Greg Boyd...one thing he said caught my attention. He said that some of us have the kind of me and my personal Jesus religion...it goes like this "I asked Jesus into my heart so he's always there. I take Him out when I need him. I take Him out when I want to get blessed. I take Him out when I need to get free from condemnation. I take him out when I need my finances to be helped. I put Him away when I'm sinning or when I'm just doing my ordinary kind of life, but he's always there like a genie in the bottle to be taken out and talked to when I need Him." This caught me off guard. Is this me? Do I have a me and my personal Jesus religion or faith? No! I don't want that! Perhaps that is what I think though. How deep is my faith really? I want it to be more. I desperately want it to be more. I have become more aware of my shallowness. It's great to be a christian when there are lots of christians around and when there is a worship band or when people are excited and there is hype and I get excited and hyped up. There is nothing wrong with that, don't get me wrong. But I see now that I am shallow. If my faith and relationship with Jesus is based solely off of those experiences I really have no depth at all. I don't know Jesus at all. I know that it feels good to worship and I know that it feels good to be around people who share the same vision and faith. I know that part of me feels safe there. Those things are great and many times I have felt the holy spirit at work in those situations but they are feelings and when things happen that I don't understand those feelings don't do anything for me, I need more.

So I have decided to embark on a new journey. One to know Jesus without the hype. Everyday, big and small, in the shallow end and the deep end. I am tired of having to start over every time something happens that shakes me up, my faith must be more. I don't want a personal Jesus religion, it's not good enough for me. I believe God wants more. Writing this out keeps me somewhat accountable. I need to start at the beginning. I need to re-evaluate and rebuild the foundation.

All throught my childhood and on into the teenage year when I come downstairs in the morning I find my mom doing devotions and praying. We always prayed together for important things happening at school. Whenever something scary happened that needed the Lord's help I always went to Mom because I knew her and God were close, her prayers worked. I always said that one day when I am a mom I want to pray for my kids just like my mom. At this point in my life I am realizing that one day if I am going to have the depth of my mother I need to follow in her footsteps and seek after God. I want to love God and know Him like my mom. So if you would just say a prayer for me as I walk into this new journey. Pray that it would change me and bring some depth to my shallow world.

Yours Truly,
Darcie

Josh's Graduation....Class of 2007!!!!

This past Friday was my brother Josh's grade 8 graduation. I can't believe that he has graduated elementary school and is already going into high school. He is my baby brother and he is growing up. My other brother greg is heading into grade 10 and will be getting his license this summer....hopefully! It is crazy when your little brothers start growing up. Change is usually good but can be scary too. This past week I have been thinking a lot about change. Sometimes when you take the risk and step out into the unknown I suppose you discover many blessings. If my parents would have not moved to this unknown place called Wainfleet, we would have missed out on so many blessings. The blessings of being part of a wonderful church, growing up in a beautiful community and getting to have so many wonderful relationships. I don't know what the future will hold but I pray that I will be able to trust Jesus with any change he places in my path.
I also have been thinking a lot about death lately. Since the events of the past couple of weeks I have been a bit fearful. I am glad that I have the hope of heaven someday but I hope that I will be able to live long on earth. There are so many things I want to experience: getting married, having kids, raising them, travelling and meeting new people. I pray that I will get to experience these things. Tragedy can often really shake a person, even a bystander. I hope that the Lord will continue to work all these things out in my heart and mind.
Today was a good day. Church was this morning and I enjoyed a wonderful nap this afternoon. Mom and I tried this new make-up for your eyes this morning. I have very sensitive eyes and now they are swollen. I guess I won't be using that stuff anymore, mom really likes it though! This evening my dearest friend Diana and I went to Starbucks in St. Kitts....I enjoyed a green tea frap.....oh i love them so much! After that I went for a swim, it was a perfect evening for a swim. My family had Swiss Chalet take-out and now are enjoying watching Shrek 2...I love Sunday nights. It is so great to enjoy nights like this together as a family, I love them more and more everyday. Anyways I hope that you enjoyed your Sunday wherever you are.

Blessings,
The Kindred Spirit

My Favourite Things....

I always like it when Oprah does her favourite things show. I also always wish that I could be in the audience when she does those shows. I could go home with some of Oprah's favourite things. What are your favourite things? Here is a list of ten of my favourite things (that I can remember at this very moment)....

#1 - Lying on my bed on a warm's summer day with my windows open, the blinds halfway down and my ceiling fan and my
other fan blowing and feeling the breeze and the sun all at the same time.

#2 - Having someone play with my hair or tickle my back.

#3 - Green grapes, strawberries and chocolate chips all in the same bowl....yummmy!

#4 - A night with the girls to watch either Pride and Prejudice or Anne of Green Gables.

#5 - A Senators game with the whole family watching in the living room.

#6 - Lunches out with mom.

#7 - Earl Grey Vanilla tea with milk.

#8 - Dinner out with my family at Swiss Chalet.

#9 - I love getting notes.....especially from mom.

#10 - Hottubing with my little brother Josh.

ok and one more....I love summers at Chesley Lake Camp! It's nice to think about your favourite things....try it!

Yours Truly,
The Kindred Spirit