Check It...

Awesome post by Donald Miller today. Check it out here.

Cheers,
Darc :)

The Only Tragedy in Life is to Feel Nothing...

Yesterday I felt like I had my heart ripped out, again. It's happened for the past two years at this time and I should be used to it by now but it seems that it only gets worse every year. After a wonderful summer home my best friend flew back this morning to her second home just outside of Port Au Prince, Haiti. I cried as she pulled out of my driveway. I think I'm getting more emotional as I get older. I decided last night that I needed to go for a drive, my Mom wanted to come with, a decision I'm sure she regretted when halfway through the drive while she was talking I just started sobbing out of nowhere. She just listened and let me cry. I tell you, I think Moms are the best medicine for any ache. Crying is one of the best releases I know, it doesn't make it better but it just feels better to cry, maybe it's a woman thing?

Goodbye's are the worst. Right after the person leaves you have this rush of memories of all the time spent together, all the coffee, all the laughs, all the drives and vents and tears you've shared. You think about how you've watched each other grow and change into the person they are today and how you wouldn't be the person you are today if you hadn't known them. And you have to let them go, until they come back, whenever that may be. 

I'm beginning to think it's much harder to be the one standing in the driveway than the one driving away.  

But I can't forget that it's been a wonderful summer. I am blessed. Here's a few of my favs...

Someone once said that the only tragedy in life is to feel nothing at all. I agree. Because whether I'm flying high or valley deep, even though I wouldn't always choose what I feel I have to believe that it's somehow playing a role in shaping who I am and who I'm becoming. 

I hope you are blessed with all the feelings of life whether they are high or low or somewhere in between. And I hope that you are blessed to experience friendship like I have, I think everyone deserves to have friends who love like mine do. 

And here's to hoping Fall will hold even more joy than the summer has!

Yours Truly, 

The Kindred Spirit

A Beautiful Evening for a Baptism...

This past Tuesday I had a chance to attend the baptism of two very special people. Jen and her daughter Sydney were baptized out at the lake at a beautiful cottage. You may remember me mentioning Jen before, she is the photographer (check her blog out under my links) and she has been teaching me a lot about photography. She asked if I would take some pictures at the baptism and of course I said yes. I mean when a wonderful photographer like Jen asks an amateur to take some shots at such a special ceremony there was no way I was saying no! Here is a peek at some of the moments I had the chance to capture....

The evening was a wonderful celebration of what God has done and is continuing to do in the lives of Jen & Sydney. The night was shared with good friends overlooking a beautiful scene and if I may add the cake was delicious. I so look forward to seeing more of the plans that God is unfolding in the lives of this family. 

Yours Truly, 

Darcie

Don't Give Up!

I have been inspired.

My inspiration has come from 3 words.

Yes, 3 simple words.

Are you ready for them? Here they are...

DON'T GIVE UP.

I'm sure you've heard these 3 short words a billion times before. I'm sure they've passed through your ears, rolled off your tongue and played through your mind again and again but maybe you've never taken the time to think about the power that can be unleashed in this phrase.

If I think back to the times and circumstances in which I've heard these words I think back to moments when all I wanted to do was give up...

• I was working on a high school math problem at my kitchen table....my Mom and I both in tears because we couldn't solve what looked like a simple math problem.
• I was attempting to run the block and felt like I might pass out.
• I was away from home for a year working on a ministry team and all I wanted to drive home where everything was safe and familiar.
• I realized I threw my retainer out by accident and now that particular trash bag with my retainer in it was in the dumpster and I wasn't sure I had what it took to dig through that trash.
• I watched (and was thrilled) for another friend who got engaged. 
• I had what seemed like the worst shift of my life at work.
• I dropped the muffin pan in the oven, the pan had the muffins in them.

All of us face situations, whether humorous in retrospect or not, where all we feel like doing is giving up and throwing in the towel. Sometimes though there is someone or something inside us that pushes us to keep going. Something that tells us that we have to keep fighting, have to keep pushing on because whether it's true or not we have to believe that what's waiting for us will be worth it. We have to believe that the joy that comes after the struggle will be even sweeter because we had to struggle.

I am faced daily with the choice to give up or not to give up. I get to decide the stuff that I'm going to be made out of. And to be completely honest, often I don't make the right choice. I get discouraged and far too easily fall prey to the mindset that I'm not good enough, nothing good will ever happen to me, there must be something wrong with me because I'm not where I think I should be at this point or I'm not where that person is, I'm not pretty enough, I'm not smart enough, I'm not skinny enough, I'm not strong or disciplined enough or I'll never get to where I want to be. These are the kind of thoughts that it's really easy (and I know this personally) to get stuck in. These thoughts seem to be my cushion and by cushion I mean the place I fall back on. I think we all have a cushion, it's like our default setting and we have to wrestle to keep going despite these thoughts that threaten to steal our joy.

I'm one of those lucky people that has an amazing friendship with my Mom. She's the person I talk to about everything, she gets the bad, the ugly and the uglier and sadly she's doesn't get the good as much as she should. Amidst my ugly rants she will often say to me in her gentle and loving way "Darc, don't give up". There's something in the way that she says it to me that always makes me feel hopeful. It's like she knows something I don't. It's kind of like God....lol. I often tell God what I really think about things and sometimes there's a part of me that really wonders if He's got it figured out, if He really does have a plan for my life? But there's the little awesome verse that answers that question...Jeremiah 29:11...For I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.

BAM...

DON'T GIVE UP.

Because whatever it is, whether it's a bully at school, uncertainty about your job, difficulty with school, tough stuff happening in your marriage, a lack of marriage, an illness, peer pressure, loneliness, grief, whatever your stuff is Don't Give Up because God has plans to give you a hope and a future. So keep pressing on, you are not alone and maybe one day you'll look back and understand.

These words should be my anthem because this is where I'm at and to believe this is my battle.

Tonight I'm going to choose not to give up, and tomorrow morning, well, I guess we'll see what happens?

Sweet Dreams for you movers and shakers, may you be known for and marked as a person who never gives up and always hopes!

~Darc

Going To The Chapel...

This past Saturday I went to a wedding. Two of my friends got hitched.....and I think everyone at that wedding would echo my sentiments in saying "it's about time"! Derek and Sarah Sherk (that has a nice ring to it) were pretty much created to be together. Anyone whose grown up with them can say that when they weren't dating we all knew that they should be dating and I don't think any of us could ever really see one of them without the other. Derek knew this from the start, Sarah started out knowing it but forgot it for a while, but Derek waited patiently trusting that God would work it out and she would remember it again. Last summer all seemed right with the world when they declared publicly that they were officially dating and a few months later all of our hearts skipped a beat when Derek proposed to Sarah over the Christmas Holidays! Finally July 3rd came and we all cheered as they tied the knot. It was a beautiful day full of wonderful friends and whole lot of fun! Here's a little taste of the day....

Not only did Sarah and Derek get married but me and my girls were reunited at last!!!

THIS IS THE BEST!!!!

Don't you just love to celebrate LOVE!!!! I know I do!

I wonder who will be next?!?

~The Kindred Spirit

CHANGE or EXPIRE?!?!?

Change.

That word is terrifying and exciting all at the same time.

As I grow and live I am finding that there is a part of me that craves change and yet there's a part of me that just wants things to stay the same. The stay the same part is the little girl inside of me that doesn't want to grow up and that just wants to be safe in my parents arms forever. This is that part of me that doesn't want to face the big world full of responsibility and unanswered questions and things that make me hurt and the fact that things don't always turn out the way you thought they would. I've realized over the last few weeks that I'm grieving my childhood. It sounds a bit funny when I write it out here but it took me a while to be able to figure it out. It took me a while to be able to actually identify that at the root of some of the things going on in my life is that I don't want to let go of what was so good and so safe and so full of love and laughter and all the good things.

But things change.

My younger brother Greg is leaving in September to spend a year working at L'arche in Ottawa. After 18 years of pastoring at Wainfleet BIC my Dad will be transitioning into a leadership & recruiting role with the BIC Canadian Conference, which means big changes for both my Dad and Mom. My youngest brother Josh has one year left of high school, ONE more year! When did this happen? When did my cute little bubby become this tall, handsome young man who owns a car and has a job and is getting ready for college in a year? There's a part of me that feels like I'm being left behind and perhaps it's because I'm clinging so tightly to the little girl inside of me, the girl who just wants it to stay the same. I haven't figured out what to do with this yet. Maybe one day I'll wake up and the fear will subside?

Then there's the other part of me; the part of me that wants new experiences with new people to learn from and new challenges to face. It's the part of me that wants to expand my thinking and embrace responsibility and independence as if it was a familiar friend. The part of me that doesn't want to be stagnant or caught in a rut but continually moving. I started reading one of Donald Miller's books called 'Through Painted Deserts' and he writes about this very thing....

"I remember that sweet sensation of leaving, years ago, some ten now, leaving Texas for who knows where. I could not have known about this beautiful place, the Oregon I have come to love, this city of great people, the smell of coffee and these evergreens reaching up into a mist of sky, these sunsets spilling over the west hills to slide a red glow down the streets of my town. 

And I could not have know then that if I had been born here, I would have left here, gone someplace south to deal with horses, to get on some open land where you can see tomorrow's storm brewing over a high desert. I could not have know then that everybody, every person, has to leave, has to change like seasons; they have to or they die. The seasons reminding me that I must keep changing, and I want to change because it is God's way. All my life I have been changing. I changed from a baby to a child, from soft toys to play daggers. I changed into a teenager to drive a car, into a worker to spend some money. I will change into a husband to love a woman, into a father to love a child, change houses so we are near water, and again so we are near mountains, and again so we are near friends, keep changing with my wife, getting our love so it dies and gets born again and again, like a garden, fed by four seasons, a cycle of change. Everybody has to change, or they expire. Everybody has to leave, everybody has to leave their home and come back so they can love it again for all new reasons.

I want to keep my soul fertile for the changes, so things keep getting born in me, so things keep dying when it is time for things to die. I want to keep walking away from the person I was a moment ago, because a mind was made to figure things out, not to read the same page recurrently. Only the good stories have the characters different at the end than they were at the beginning."

I think this sums the other part of me up completely. These are the things I know to be true. Change can be a wonderful thing, wonderful and hard at the same time. Wonderful because things are new and different and your soul is ready for it and hard because it's new and different and your soul remembers how it used to be.

You live in the tension. You choose to keep moving and trusting. I want to choose these things because I don't want to expire. I don't want to read the same page my whole life.

So maybe it's going to take me a bit to let go but the change is in the journey, right?

All I know is that my childhood was wonderful and I wouldn't change it for anything in the world but I want to be able to live fully present in the here and now. I don't want to miss the fantastic things happening in this new phase because I'm stuck in the old.

I have to keep changing, because this is God's way.

Oh I Went Down To Georgia...

So a few months ago I planned to take a little visit down south to visit one of my closest friends. Her name is BJ (Brittany Joy) and she lives in the beautiful state of Georgia. Last Saturday I flew into Atlanta and spent the next four days catching up, seeing the city and having some very fine dining experiences. My body wasn't used to the extreme heat and humidity so I drank water like crazy and seemed to "glow" every where I went! A few highlights of my trips were getting to see the Laser Show at Stone Mountain, going to the Georgia Aquarium, seeing the Coke Museum and attending 12Stone (BJ's church) which if I may add has a Starbucks in it.....I know! I also enjoyed the fine dining at the Cheesecake Factory, ChicfilA and The Cracker Barrell.....yummy! My flight home was delayed due to bad weather in Atlanta so I had plenty of time to sit in the airport and people watch....there were tons of delays and cancellations! When we were finally in the air I got the change to witness one of the most amazing things I've ever seen....it was like a lightening show below the plane the entire way home, the sky just lit up. My window seat on the Delta plane gave me a birds eye view of the mystery and beauty of a part of God's creation, it was magnificent.   I've included just a few highlight pics of my trip below....hope you enjoy!

This last picture is my view of Atlanta just as the plane was leaving the city via sky! Flying at night does have it's benefits!

Getting to see new places and visit with friends is such a blessing. I'm already looking forward to my next trip.....wherever that may be!

Sweet Dreams Y'all,
~The Kindred Spirit

Say Cheese...

I've always loved taking pictures, looking at pictures, editing pictures and of course hanging pictures all over the walls of my room. So recently I was thinking and decided that I needed a new hobby. I want to learn something new. I've always loved photography so I thought why not take a class, why not get a really good camera and take a class and learn something new? So I bought a camera. Actually I bought a very expensive camera, one which put a good dent in my savings (sigh). It's a Nikon D5000 and if you're having trouble picturing what that might look like.....let me show you....

It's beautiful isn't it? I think so. Some of my girls from my jr. high small group were trying to name it. My hands were shaking when I opened it. I've never bought something like this before. I've held one but it's never been mine. I was afraid I might drop it or push a wrong button and cause it to deconstruct, if that's even possible. So for the past few weeks I've been practicing and trying to figure out how to work this piece of technical art. Thankfully there is this little button that has a question mark on the side of the camera and if I push it a definition of the setting I'm on pops up. I don't know what I would do without this button. 

My Mom has a friend who is a photographer. She's fabulous and she is going to mentor me as I embark on learning this new craft. You can check out her blog here http://www.photographywithjen.blogspot.com/.

I'll keep you posted on how it goes. Let me know if you want a personal photo shoot....I need all the practice I can get :)

I think I might start to get labeled 'the girl with the camera' so if you see me....say hi!

Yours Truly, 

Darcie

There's No Theme Like A 'Hard Wood' Theme...

Today was a beautiful day. I took one of the ladies from the group home out for a walk and while we went along the path and looked at the birds and the stream and the flowers I was taken back for a moment to last summer.

I spent last summer living and working at Christian Horizons conference centre in Paisley. I worked as their program coordinator. The conference centre is quite large and behind the main building you will find what we call "the back 40", which is about 40 acres of trees and trail and a whole ton of bugs. We typically use the back 40 for staff games, hikes and wagon rides. Now one day I was informed that since the leadership staff wanted to look into other ways that they could use the back 40 and needed some advice on how to do that, there would be a naturalist coming in to give us some ideas. I was told that my presence and one of my recreation team members presence would be needed on this special occasion, along with our supervisor. The naturalist arrived and we headed out to the back 40 for what I didn't know would be 2 hours of enlightenment. The naturalist was an older man, a retired teacher and of course a lover of all things nature. The man decided to treat my supervisor and my team member and I like students in a class, an elementary class at that. He would walk and then stop and ask us to observe our surroundings. He would ask us things about what our senses were sensing....lol. We pretty much could only walk a few feet before he would stop us. He showed us flowers and gave us the history on where their name came from. He talked about trees and animals and trees and rocks and trees and dirt and oh did I mention tress. Some of this was interesting and I must say that it all seemed more interesting before we reached the 1 hour point. The naturalist would occasionally ask us questions about our program. He asked about our theme. Last summer our theme was the Horizon Jungle and I tried my best to explain to him what that meant. I believe his response made the whole 2 hours worth it, for anytime I think about it I always smile. After I told the man about the theme he seemed somehow frustrated like the theme was no good. He kind of sighed and then went on a spiel about nature again and his final suggestion was with all of this nature why don't you do a hard wood theme? I'm sorry.....a hard wood theme? I tried to kindly respond by telling him that I didn't think that would fly. Let's think about this.......people spend all year waiting for their week at camp....thinking about all the fun they've had in the past and how much fun they will have this year and of course they arrive and find out this year's theme is hard wood. BORING!!!!! I mean I'm not saying that in the right EDUCATIONAL setting that a hard wood theme wouldn't be um, interesting but seriously at camp. Clearly this man was a genius when it came to nature and very passionate about it but perhaps he may had spent a little too much time with the trees. He was I think he may have offered to bring us some books and perhaps a display as well, which we didn't end up using. We thanked the man for his time and ideas and he was on his way.

I still remember bits and pieces from our hike but nothing can be clearer than the hard wood theme.

It's too bad it's too late to suggest the hard wood theme to this year's rec staff for their program. Could have been the best year yet!

Sweet Dreams,
~The Kindred Spirit

Bloodline...

I heard this song a few months ago. I've listened to it again and again. I find the lyrics challenging. It's one of those songs you want other people to listen to but you want to ask them what they think it means.
It's called Bloodline by Matt Morris....

She was a girl living in the city, clinging to old religion
Praying for electricity to keep it warm for the little ones
Nobody made her wise to the things a girl might find
In a belly of a hungry man who don't care nothing about his bloodline
She got lost in the bloodline
Heavy cost of a bloodline
She goes on she cries at night and keeps alive his bloodline
So much riding on a bloodline
Why is he hiding from the bloodline?
It aint right she cries at night and keeps alive his bloodline

She heard heaven is invite only, reserved for Christian soldiers
Not un-wed girls living in the city asking for change from strangers
But father said Jesus loves her even though she never married
God loves her more than the Christians do, she's part of His holy bloodline
She got saved in the bloodline
The price He paid for the bloodline
Changed her life she cries at night and keeps alive his bloodline
She believes in his bloodline
Lives and breathes by the bloodline
With all her might she cries at night and keeps alive his bloodline

I know I should have never left her to shoulder all the burden
She probably won't forgive me, God might not either
I made a cross and lay it on her back
But I never broke her spirit and she owes that to her bloodline
She stayed strong for the bloodline, I did wrong by the bloodline
But she went on she cried at night and kept alive the bloodline
Sacrifice for the bloodline, paid the price for the bloodline
For all her life she cried at night and kept alive the bloodline

Oh she cried at night and kept alive her bloodline 

Deep lyrics eh? 

I invite your thoughts, 
Darc